I just finished the first episode. For those of you who don’t know me, know this. Teenage suicide is a subject I am far more familiar with than I’d like to be. However, some things in life you don’t have a choice about. Being a survivor of suicide is one of them.
Within the first 5 minutes of the first episode I thought to myself, have the people who wrote this ever stepped foot into a high school after it’s struck by suicide? A few days after I lost my first friend to suicide a group of my friends were called into the office of our high school. For some reason we decided to record a video for my friend and tell him how much we loved and would miss him. I still have the video and I watched it not too long ago. We didn’t look like the students look in this episode who just lost a classmate a few days prior. We weren’t dressed in cute clothes. None of the girls had on makeup. We were barely functioning. We were in complete shock. All of us looked like we had been ripped from childhood and turned into adults within seconds. Our eyes swollen shut, tears flowing without control, our bodies still trembling from the pain days later. Taking a selfie with a sad face? WTF? Even if we had cell phones we wouldn’t have been able to find the picture button through the flooding tears.
After my second friend took her own life a year later, I remember sitting at her funeral and seeing a guy there who she worked with. Just like this show, he barely knew her, and he had a crush on her. He was walked into the funeral being held up by both of his parents and was practically carried out because the grief was too much for him to handle.
Oh, and then there were the teachers…who I watched bury three of their students who died by self-inflicted gunshots. They didn’t carry on with class, they too could barely withstand the loss. They too were left wondering in the hallways trying to figure out what the hell happened? How did they not see it coming? What do they say to these kids who were looking to them for support?
So I guess my opinion of episode one is this. When you take your own life, you instantly change the course of others. You not only break peoples’ hearts, you leave them with an unspeakable amount of pain. If you’re thinking about taking your own life and you want to know what the people who you leave behind will feel like, do me a favor. Pause 13 Reasons Why and flip through Netflix until you find Saving Private Ryan.
Watch the opening scene and pay attention to the looks on those soldiers faces. Yeah, the guy wondering around in shock with his arm in his hand…that’s what your death with do to every single person you leave behind who loved you. That is exactly what their face will look like when they hear the news…some for days, some for years, and for your family….the rest of their lives. That’s the cold hard fact about suicide…there will be no one delivering your tapes or taking selfies. There will just be people trying to figure out how to get the air back in their lungs to carry on with the life that you left behind.
As for the bullies who may have pushed you there…well…they will continue on with life…bullying someone else….only caring about themselves. So, why not live life to it’s fullest and do what makes you happy. It’s a better payback because one thing that will put a bully back in their place is seeing other people filled with joy.
Onward and upward…with a lack of something positive to say other than suicide isn’t something you pay people back with. It destroys lives. Ask for help…nothing is worth killing yourself over…especially some little boy who probably has a dick the size of a pencil! #suicideprevention #13reasonwhy #episode1 #pissedmeoff